Jay-Walkers Guide to Nairobi.

Just so we are clear, Every1 in Nairobi Jay-Walks! For those who do not know what Jay-walking is...

'...refers to illegal or reckless pedestrian crossing of a roadway.' Wikipedia.

so you see we all do it, in a day i think i j walk about 50 times or so, I wonder with the new lights being installed all over Nairobi, will they ticket jay-walkers too? just in case they do not say that they will ticket us... (cause we all know that you follow a law to a point, you should really, but unless there is a negative repurcation to not following the law, then , we rarely follow the law, True?... be honest.)

So here is your guide to Nairobi city;

• Do not cross in front of a Citi Hopper bus, KBS bus, Unified Poa bus, Metro Trans bus, or any PSV (Public Service Vehicle)... even if there is a zebra-crossing, especially if there is no light telling you to go, they will hit you, i swear! They have this law, 'mwenye nguvu mpishe.' - Let the strong pass. So puny you against 17tonnes (approximate) is not so bright.
• Do not cross main highways, IE Thika road... unless you are using the overpass (Genius!) Be bright, give your self  a fighting chance, come on, do some physics, MASS*VELOCITY= A LOT OF HURT! If you are going to jaywalk, pick your roads carefully, Little one way roads will work you wonders in perfecting your jaywalking. Just saying. 
• Wear bright colours. Neon pink, green and yellow are awesome! What you want is to illuminate. You know why, the brighter you dress, the higher your fighting chance. Dark colours means that that tired, overworked driver will not see your goth-like self walking the road, and that means... you know what...
• Look right then left then right again before crossing the road. I know you remember something like that you were taught in kindergarten, yes you do... you just ignore it, In Nairobi, the cars may be driven on the wrong lane, going in the wrong direction, you feel me, so be sure to Look right then left then right again, and it does not hurt to confirm again, and again that there is no vehicle coming your way.
• Pay attention to what you are doing, is crossing the road!, you can listen to your music later or call that person latter, trust me when i say that you always have time, how long will it take you to cross a road really, so put your gadget away and cross relatively safely. 

But all in all, follow the rules, cross at a Zebra crossing, walk on the right side of the  road. Stay safe. As cliche as this may sound, You Only Live Once.

Nekh.